Bill and Jann Newton a 40 year commitment to God!

Bill and Jann Pics

This is a congratulations to a couple that I have personally seen 36 of the 40 years of their marriage!  As a kid I witnessed the beginning of this long term commitment that they made to each other and more importantly God. Ive heard it said, “marriage is falling in love over and over to the same person” and I have seen this with them.   I can say today that they have the best marriage of any couple I have been  blessed  to be around.    Today I just want to say Thank You. Thanks for keeping commitments. Thanks for being an example to so many. Thanks for being consistent. Thanks for living a Christ centered life. Thanks for not letting the good times get to your head. Thanks for not letting the bad times take you down. Thanks for listening to each other. Thanks for holding yourself accountable.  Thanks for fighting for whats right at all cost. Thanks for laughing together. Thanks for loving unconditionally.  Thanks for staying tough in turmoil.  Thanks for leading others. Thanks for always keeping your family in a bible based church. Thanks for smiling at each other. Thanks for holding hands. Thanks for comforting each other. Thanks for always looking for the good.  Thanks for loving each other unconditionally. Thanks for falling down and getting back up.  Thanks for following the scriptures.  Thanks for being the example, a son needed of a parent.  On January 10th 2016 I know the heavens will be rejoicing for a couple committed to HIM.

Love you

your son

THE “Failure View”

FAILURE VIEW

6 principles to live by to change your view

I have heard people  talk on  “money view” and Dr. Kelly Randolph, , Dr Tom Ascol, Tim Marks and many others talk on your “world view”.  Its has truly helped me too look thru the proper lens about my faith-finances etc. Today Id like to unfold the “failure view.”  The failure view is the lens in which you look at failure. Two people can go thru the same failure and one will look at it as a losing experience and quit, while the other will look at it as a learning experience and grow. Same event,  way different response.

 I was 19 years old battling depression/self-worth and I was recommended by a christian a book titled “Telling yourself the Truth.” I realized for 19  yrs that Id been lieing to myself about failure.  Page 118-119 in Tim Marks book  “Confidence of a Champion” gives us questions to ask ourselves during those trying times as well.    One of the greatest lies we tell ourselves is that failure is bad and we should hide from it.  I remember a quote Steven Wright said ” If at first you don’t succeed, destroy all evidence you tried”  Now he was just having fun but that is exactly what I wanted to do with my past failures instead of learning from them and moving forward. All successful preachers, businessman , athletes, parents, and spouses have and will continue to fail and fail big.  Failure should be some of the most exciting times because it means you are having movement!!

  SEVEN WINNERS THAT FAILED BIG

First Failure:  Wasnt able to speak until he was 4 years old and his teachers said he would not amount too much.  He was a Theoretical Physicist and Nobel Prize Winner…… Albert Einstein

Second Failure: Was abused as a child and demoted from her job as a news anchor because they said ” you’re not fit for TV”……..Oprah Winfrey

Third Failure:  Fired from newspaper for “lacking imagination” and “having no original ideas”…….Walt Disney

Forth Failure: A highschool dropout, whose personal struggles with drugs and poverty took him to the point of suicidal attempts…… Eminem

Fifth Failure:  His fiance died, failed in business, had a nervous breakdown and was defeated in 8 elections.  16th president of the USA….. Abraham Lincoln

Sixth Failure: Lost his father  at age 5 .  In his 30s and his 50s had companies change the deal on him that cost him and his family millions.  Now has a 40 year record for the javelin and is creating one of the most spectacular comeback stories and more importantly, a great dad…… Bill Newton

Seventh Failure: His parents divorced at a young age.  Had reading disorders and dyslexia diagnosed as the teachers recommended he be held back. Always fought a low self-esteem and struggled with alcoholism. Now is a best-selling author of two books, my personal mentor, …… Tim Marks

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The most successful reading this have failed the most, looked dumb the most, been embaraced the most, took rejection the most, and been hurt the most, learned from the experiences and kept going.  Not only should you know that failure is not bad, but I recommend you follow or mentor with someone who has failed and failed BIG!   Just make sure they have used that experience to learn from instead of complain from.  A leaders  life will be DREAM-STRUGGLE- VICTORY not DREAM-STRUGGLE-VICTIM.  Here is 6 principles that I have lived by along my journey that I pray helps you.

1st principle:      When you feel  a chance of failure, hit it head on FAST!!  The longer you wait, the harder it is to get past the failure and the stronger the feeling becomes. To a leader cowardice is more shameful than fear.

2nd principle:    Eliminate the need for perfection!!  Since we were in kindergarten we were taught the closer we get to an A the better off we are.  Salvador Dali says ” have no fear of perfection, you’ll never reach it.”   It’s actually not about perfection as much as continually losing long enough to find out how to win and never quitting…..

3rd principle:   When you fail admit it!!  Winston Churchill said “success is not final, failure is not fatal; it is the courage to continue that counts.”  Learn to share your mistakes instead of shunning your mistakes.  I personally have done and continue to do some of the most ridiculous and dumb things along the path to success.

4th principle:  Don’t be a CRITIC!!!   Starve the habit to dump negatives about others, anywhere,  even to your best buddy .  We can get past our own failures if we do not hold others to the standard of perfection.  In my life, the more I quit holding others to a standard they can’t uphold, I quit holding myself to that same standard.

5th principle:  Be in thankful mode!!  Focus on where you are winning and all the things God has done in your life!  One of Satan’s best tools to stop you from what God has called you to do is to remind you of your past and all the hurts you have done to yourself and others have done to you.

6th principle:   Dream Again!!  The best way to get past failure is to look forward to the dreams in your life that you are chasing!  God bless your run towards your destiny!

Cody

Trust is the glue

TRUST

To excel in any areas of life , faith,family, finance,fitness, freedom,following,fun,friendship, there must be trust. Tim Marks my personal mentor says “people only do activities with  the people they trust and like. ” Stephen Covey says “there is nothing as fast as the speed of trust.”  Its faster than anything you can think about, faster than the computer or the internet, for when trust is present, mistakes are forgiven and forgotten. TRUST IS THE GLUE OF LIFE.  

My wife and I just spent 7 days in Florida with some great friends we trust and during that time we were never worried about who paid for what or what they would or wouldn’t do around our kids. We knew they had our best interests at heart and we had theirs.  High trust relationships are easy and effortless, where as low trust relationships are difficult and stressful.

How People  break your  Trust

Here are a few questions to ask yourself to understand the magnitude of trust . Many nights are spent in agony over broken trust.

  1. Have you ever had a broken heart over trust being lost in a marriage?
  2. Has a pastor or someone at the church caused you to lose trust in that church or even in God?  as a side note… NEVER NEVER judge a perfect  God by imperfect men
  3. Have you ever been lied to when buying a house or a car?
  4. Did you find out that your business partners have been stealing from the company?
  5. Is there anyone you thought was your friend and then you heard they were talking about you?
  6. Have you ever thought your new job was gonna be one way and ended up being another
  7. Has anyone ever looked into your eyes and lied to your face?

How we break trust

It is extremely easy to look at broken trust from the offended side but lets also do it from us being the offender. Being untrustworthy is not just something they do it is something we do.  This exercise is very difficult to do because it takes great pains to look at self but lets ask ourselves a few questions as well.

  1. Have we ever told a little lie or just maybe stretched the truth to make us look better?
  2. Is there ever a time when you were not happy with a friend/bus partner/family member and instead of talking with them about it like Mathew 18 says, we just end up telling someone else. “just wanting to get off our chest” lol  aka GOSSIP
  3. Have you ever made a promise to anyone and didn’t keep it?  Promise making is one of the easiest things you could ever do and promise keeping is one of the most difficult.
  4. Have you ever written anything online without stating who exactly wrote it? Many things written online by faceless men cannot be trusted because trustworthy men have no need to remain anonymous unless there is partial truths being told. Charles Spurgeon wrote “a lie can travel around the world while the truth is putting on its shoes”
  5. Have you ever hid from creditors/family members/bus partners/church family because you thought by hiding you wouldn’t have to handle it.

When I was in school we had a big exam for algebra and I had a teacher that scared me to death.  He wasn’t mean, he just expected alot and didn’t pull any punches, which at that time in my life. scared me. The day of the exam that I hadn’t studied for, I… instead of showing up getting an F i just called in sick to school.  The next day back at school I was sheepish as I walked by that teacher and he could tell, sooo he stopped me and stated in a stern voice “NEWTON” if you would just study, you wouldn’t have to fake being sick”   HIDING is an UNTRUSTWORTHY ACT

Now,  I hope after asking all those questions to ourselves, we can see where ALL of us can work on this foundation to success in those 8 areas of FAITH-FAMILY-FINANCE-FITNESS-FRIENDSHIP-FREEDOM-FUN-FOLLOWING

“Trust is to human relationships what faith is to gospel living, it is the beginning place, the foundation on which more can be built. Where trust is- love can flourish”  Barbara Smith

                                                      

People trust those who add value into there life with more deposits of selflessness than withdrawals of selfishness

Stephen Coveys “Emotional Bank Account” for Trust

Deposits-

  1. Seek first to understand
  2. keep promises
  3. honesty and openness
  4. kindness courtesies
  5. win win or no deal
  6. clarified expectations
  7. loyalty the absent
  8. apologies
  9. receiving feedback and giving “I” messaging
  10. forgiveness

Withdrawals

  1. Seek first to be understood
  2. break promises
  3. smooth manipulation
  4. unkindness, discourtesies
  5. win-lose
  6. violating expectations
  7. disloyalty
  8. pride, conceit, arrogance
  9. not receiving feedback and giving “you” messages
  10. holding grudges

Stephen Covey goes on to  say there our 3 common characteristics of the Deposits that we can learn from

  1. it will take initiative
  2. it will take an absence of selfishness and a presence of humility
  3. it will require sacrifice

There is much freedom in a disciplined life and if we are ready to be disciplined in any area being trustworthy is a great beginning spot.  I would like to thank Bill Newton and Jann Newton,  for being people of character that i can trust so i could see a wonderful example of this amazing principle.

god bless

cody

Resolve to Game Plan and DO in 2013

Anytime I get the chance to go fishing I take it.  Before we leave the house I make a written list of what is needed and what I currently have.  If you don’t game plan before you go fishing, you can forget specific lures, rods or even the most important piece, the snacks. Yesterday I listened to a cd from the  LIFE Business about making sure and having a written game plan in all that we do by Tim Marks. . It was now time to make a new game plan in my spiritual life, family life, health and my business for 2013. Here is 7 points to look at when making game plan.

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  1. It should be written down. Some use a computer but for me it is best to have it written on paper.
  2. Always have it with you, and I mean always—–This one was big for me!
  3. What is my scoreboard as of today?     It’s good to know where you are today so you can chart progress.
  4. What is my 3-6-12 month goal?
  5. What do I need to change about myself to get where I need to go?
  6. Who am I counseling with to keep me on track weekly or at least monthly?
  7. How can I track this in 7 day intervals.  Progress must be made weekly or frustration and discouragement set in.

2013 is our year to move forward if we weekly PLAN and daily DO

Whomever takes the Blame Wins!

I was a 14-year-old  kid going thru Hesston High School in Kansas  being very, very rambunctious, and often disrespectful.  The thought that crossed my mind while acting this way was if I never get caught “I WIN”.  Many times my friends and I either cheated on tests, brought in stink bombs ” that actually is still funny” lol, snuck in alcohol, picked fights, or drew inappropriate picks on the chalk boards before class, and the whole goal was to not get caught. Finally we would eventually get caught and try to hand others the blame.  While it seemed innocent fun at that age, it seems the blame game never changes.

In LIFE you will be able to choose  {dream- struggle-victory} or {dream-struggle-victim}by who you lay blame for during the struggle period.  Dennis Waitley says “There are two primary choices in life: to accept conditions as they exist, or accept the responsibility for changing them”.  I believe that and also believe we have to accept the blame for where we are at.  A person who doesn’t accept the blame will say things like, it’s too hard, I’m too busy, this doesn’t work here, this is a bad time of year, if my husband/wife would etc etc, it’s too cold/hot, no money, no time, if my boss etc etc.  Shifting blame to others as I did in school or to things like time, money, spouse, co-worker,job, family,  boss seems like a good way to handle the situation we are in, but in effect it causes us to have to keep our situation because until we realize the responsible party we cannot fix the responsible one.  George Bernard Shaw wrote “Liberty means responsibility. That is why most men dread it”.

When finally I started working on myself. could I then begin handling the struggle correctly. Most go from DREAM to STRUGGLE to VICTIM only because they believe that they are a victim of the situation.  A leader goes from Dream to Struggle to Victory because he knows that he can only work on the situation correctly if he works on himself correctly by leveraging better information into his or her life .  I thank Bill and Jann Newton, Tim and Amy Marks,  for handling struggles correctly by taking Blame and working on themselves, so I could see that example and do the same thing. God Bless

Cody Newton

“His master replied, ‘Well done, good and faithful servant! You have been faithful with a few things; I will put you in charge of many things. Come and share your master’s happiness!”

Matthew 25:21

Thinking right toward people

In everything we do with others there is many goals we are trying to accomplish. Sometimes our goal is to just make more friends or just have someone to talk to. Sometimes its creating a business relationship or finding a  “dater friend,” that is what i told my wife i was looking for..lol  After reading books and listening to cds, they taught to first check your motives and make sure they were a win- win. Next is to learn principles from some of the greatest friendship builders in America. Ive heard it quoted many times “People don’t care how much you know until they know how much you care”

Dr. Joseph Schwartz. In a section about “Thinking Right Toward People,” he went into President Lyndon Johnsons 10 pts

10 POINT FORMULA FOR SUCCESS

  • (1)Learn to remember names. Inefficiency at this point may indicate that your interest is not sufficiently outgoing.
  • (2)Be a comfortable person so there is no strain in being with you. Be an old-shoe, old-hat kind of individual.
  • (3)Acquire the quality of relaxed easy-going so that things do not ruffle you.
  • (4)Don’t be egotistical. Guard against the impression that you know it all.
  • (5)Cultivate the quality of being interesting so people will get something of value from their association with you.
  • (6)Study to get “scratchy” elements out of your personality, even those of which you may be unconscious.
  • (7)Sincerely attempt to heal, on an honest Christian basis, every misunderstanding you have had or now have. Drain off grievances.
  • (8)Practice liking people until you learn to do so genuinely.
  • (9)Never miss an opportunity to say a word of congratulation upon anyone’s achievement, or express sympathy in sorrow or disappointment.
  • (10)Give spiritual strength to people, and they will give genuine affection to you.

“You cannot change Truth, but Truth can change you” MFC

“Methods are many,principles are few.methods always change,principles never do” is a quote I will never forget hearing at a conference I attended at 19 years old.  There is only one Truth for salvation and that is Jesus Christ and that Truth can be learned about by the infallible word of God , the Bible.  All good principles in day-to-day living also have their roots in the bible as well.  Fortunately for the last 4 years I was given the chance to learn about many principles that have changed my LIFE and  I thought today I would give a few ideas on resources for books etc that can help with great principles on topics such as character, purpose, attitude, programming, gameplanning,keeping score, family, friendship, financial management, leadership, conflict resolution, systems thinking,anxiety, depression, forgiveness, handling adversity, and legacy. These are some of my favorites for sure. Orrin Woodwards book “Resolved” has been the most influential on principles for me and Tim Marks book “Voyage of a Viking” is a biography I will never forget.    If anyone has any other great resources for great principles feel free to comment. god bless

 

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I also “of course” recommend the 90 Day Mental Fitness Challenge for a chance to have someone to be accountable to for growth!   www.90daymentalfitchallenge.com/