Trust is the glue

TRUST

To excel in any areas of life , faith,family, finance,fitness, freedom,following,fun,friendship, there must be trust. Tim Marks my personal mentor says “people only do activities with  the people they trust and like. ” Stephen Covey says “there is nothing as fast as the speed of trust.”  Its faster than anything you can think about, faster than the computer or the internet, for when trust is present, mistakes are forgiven and forgotten. TRUST IS THE GLUE OF LIFE.  

My wife and I just spent 7 days in Florida with some great friends we trust and during that time we were never worried about who paid for what or what they would or wouldn’t do around our kids. We knew they had our best interests at heart and we had theirs.  High trust relationships are easy and effortless, where as low trust relationships are difficult and stressful.

How People  break your  Trust

Here are a few questions to ask yourself to understand the magnitude of trust . Many nights are spent in agony over broken trust.

  1. Have you ever had a broken heart over trust being lost in a marriage?
  2. Has a pastor or someone at the church caused you to lose trust in that church or even in God?  as a side note… NEVER NEVER judge a perfect  God by imperfect men
  3. Have you ever been lied to when buying a house or a car?
  4. Did you find out that your business partners have been stealing from the company?
  5. Is there anyone you thought was your friend and then you heard they were talking about you?
  6. Have you ever thought your new job was gonna be one way and ended up being another
  7. Has anyone ever looked into your eyes and lied to your face?

How we break trust

It is extremely easy to look at broken trust from the offended side but lets also do it from us being the offender. Being untrustworthy is not just something they do it is something we do.  This exercise is very difficult to do because it takes great pains to look at self but lets ask ourselves a few questions as well.

  1. Have we ever told a little lie or just maybe stretched the truth to make us look better?
  2. Is there ever a time when you were not happy with a friend/bus partner/family member and instead of talking with them about it like Mathew 18 says, we just end up telling someone else. “just wanting to get off our chest” lol  aka GOSSIP
  3. Have you ever made a promise to anyone and didn’t keep it?  Promise making is one of the easiest things you could ever do and promise keeping is one of the most difficult.
  4. Have you ever written anything online without stating who exactly wrote it? Many things written online by faceless men cannot be trusted because trustworthy men have no need to remain anonymous unless there is partial truths being told. Charles Spurgeon wrote “a lie can travel around the world while the truth is putting on its shoes”
  5. Have you ever hid from creditors/family members/bus partners/church family because you thought by hiding you wouldn’t have to handle it.

When I was in school we had a big exam for algebra and I had a teacher that scared me to death.  He wasn’t mean, he just expected alot and didn’t pull any punches, which at that time in my life. scared me. The day of the exam that I hadn’t studied for, I… instead of showing up getting an F i just called in sick to school.  The next day back at school I was sheepish as I walked by that teacher and he could tell, sooo he stopped me and stated in a stern voice “NEWTON” if you would just study, you wouldn’t have to fake being sick”   HIDING is an UNTRUSTWORTHY ACT

Now,  I hope after asking all those questions to ourselves, we can see where ALL of us can work on this foundation to success in those 8 areas of FAITH-FAMILY-FINANCE-FITNESS-FRIENDSHIP-FREEDOM-FUN-FOLLOWING

“Trust is to human relationships what faith is to gospel living, it is the beginning place, the foundation on which more can be built. Where trust is- love can flourish”  Barbara Smith

                                                      

People trust those who add value into there life with more deposits of selflessness than withdrawals of selfishness

Stephen Coveys “Emotional Bank Account” for Trust

Deposits-

  1. Seek first to understand
  2. keep promises
  3. honesty and openness
  4. kindness courtesies
  5. win win or no deal
  6. clarified expectations
  7. loyalty the absent
  8. apologies
  9. receiving feedback and giving “I” messaging
  10. forgiveness

Withdrawals

  1. Seek first to be understood
  2. break promises
  3. smooth manipulation
  4. unkindness, discourtesies
  5. win-lose
  6. violating expectations
  7. disloyalty
  8. pride, conceit, arrogance
  9. not receiving feedback and giving “you” messages
  10. holding grudges

Stephen Covey goes on to  say there our 3 common characteristics of the Deposits that we can learn from

  1. it will take initiative
  2. it will take an absence of selfishness and a presence of humility
  3. it will require sacrifice

There is much freedom in a disciplined life and if we are ready to be disciplined in any area being trustworthy is a great beginning spot.  I would like to thank Bill Newton and Jann Newton,  for being people of character that i can trust so i could see a wonderful example of this amazing principle.

god bless

cody

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Thinking right toward people

In everything we do with others there is many goals we are trying to accomplish. Sometimes our goal is to just make more friends or just have someone to talk to. Sometimes its creating a business relationship or finding a  “dater friend,” that is what i told my wife i was looking for..lol  After reading books and listening to cds, they taught to first check your motives and make sure they were a win- win. Next is to learn principles from some of the greatest friendship builders in America. Ive heard it quoted many times “People don’t care how much you know until they know how much you care”

Dr. Joseph Schwartz. In a section about “Thinking Right Toward People,” he went into President Lyndon Johnsons 10 pts

10 POINT FORMULA FOR SUCCESS

  • (1)Learn to remember names. Inefficiency at this point may indicate that your interest is not sufficiently outgoing.
  • (2)Be a comfortable person so there is no strain in being with you. Be an old-shoe, old-hat kind of individual.
  • (3)Acquire the quality of relaxed easy-going so that things do not ruffle you.
  • (4)Don’t be egotistical. Guard against the impression that you know it all.
  • (5)Cultivate the quality of being interesting so people will get something of value from their association with you.
  • (6)Study to get “scratchy” elements out of your personality, even those of which you may be unconscious.
  • (7)Sincerely attempt to heal, on an honest Christian basis, every misunderstanding you have had or now have. Drain off grievances.
  • (8)Practice liking people until you learn to do so genuinely.
  • (9)Never miss an opportunity to say a word of congratulation upon anyone’s achievement, or express sympathy in sorrow or disappointment.
  • (10)Give spiritual strength to people, and they will give genuine affection to you.

“You cannot change Truth, but Truth can change you” MFC

“Methods are many,principles are few.methods always change,principles never do” is a quote I will never forget hearing at a conference I attended at 19 years old.  There is only one Truth for salvation and that is Jesus Christ and that Truth can be learned about by the infallible word of God , the Bible.  All good principles in day-to-day living also have their roots in the bible as well.  Fortunately for the last 4 years I was given the chance to learn about many principles that have changed my LIFE and  I thought today I would give a few ideas on resources for books etc that can help with great principles on topics such as character, purpose, attitude, programming, gameplanning,keeping score, family, friendship, financial management, leadership, conflict resolution, systems thinking,anxiety, depression, forgiveness, handling adversity, and legacy. These are some of my favorites for sure. Orrin Woodwards book “Resolved” has been the most influential on principles for me and Tim Marks book “Voyage of a Viking” is a biography I will never forget.    If anyone has any other great resources for great principles feel free to comment. god bless

 

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I also “of course” recommend the 90 Day Mental Fitness Challenge for a chance to have someone to be accountable to for growth!   www.90daymentalfitchallenge.com/

A Dad Keeping Score

Family vacation is so much fun with 4 little boys , and a little crazy too until you get them around a pool with water guns. The boys then will play cops and robbers for hours leaving there parents, Tara and I to read.  I decided to reread the Resolved book specifically on the “keeping score” chapter of the book, knowing I need to work on continually keeping my results in front of me.  Today my focus being because were spending time with the kids, on keeping score as a husband and a father.

Orrin Woodward wrote, “fans religiously keep track of the scoreboard at sporting events, but few maintain the high standards when the spotlight is placed upon their professional field of play” .  He continues next chapter, ” but imagine what would happen, if all sports fans, fans who expect the coaches to lead their teams, chose to lead their families with a similar level of expectation for excellence”.
So here is the question for all of us… If we were watching ourselves coach/lead our families what would we be yelling at ourselves  to fix? Since we are all self delusional I have asked the 2 best dads I know, Bill Newton, and  Tim Marks, where am I messing up as well?  Finally I asked my wife and kids. I’ll give  you a quick idea of how that went as he was driving the boat!
   

Daddy: Cader  do you think daddy is a good daddy

Cader: yes

Daddy: why are you sure

Cader: because your my friend and you make money so chase, cage, colby, mommy and me can eat and go places
Daddy: anything else
Cader: you taught me about Jesus  and I know you love mommy
Daddy: what do I do wrong that I can work on
Cader: nothing
Daddy: tell me the truth
Cader: ok, then will u leave me alone ?
Daddy: yes
Cader:  ok ok . well I wish you let me have pop everyday and you didn’t kiss mommy all the time, and I don’t like spankings when I hit my brothers
Daddy: thanks for the feedback ,but that will not change, love you

I love the quote by Orrin “you either hate changing bad enough to lose or hate losing bad enough to change.”. As a parent or a spouse let’s look at the scoreboard and change where we need to. I know it’s a daily process for me and I pray you will keep score  with your performance as a parent/spouse as well.  god bless

cody

Cheers to Life Founder Orrin Woodward!!

A “Thank You” to the “Founder of Founders”          Great post Tim about a great man. Tara and I 100pct agree

                                   BY TIM MARKS

I was deeply humbled by the recent blog that Orrin posted regarding Amy and myself; humbled, because I owe so much of my success to the sacrifice and commitment of Orrin and Laurie Woodward. As all world-class leaders do, Orrin constantly shines light upon others and celebrates their success, lifting them up and cheering for their victories. Since Orrin has written this blog post celebrating me and Amy, we feel that it is only appropriate to return the favor.

Orrin Woodward grew up in Columbiaville, Michigan, a town where the word “vision” wasn’t something you’d hear pop up at the average dinner table. His brilliant mind and work ethic were quickly noticed by his superiors at work, and his amazing engineering genius resulted in four engineering patents to his name by the age of 25. He was on the fast track to corporate “success”. But he was eventually exposed to some new business information, and he decided to go against the grain. He ignored the 95% advice of his friends, family and co-workers, and he plunged head-first into his first entrepreneurial venture.

Success didn’t come easily to Orrin. We might watch him speak on stage today in front of thousands of people and forget that he failed a public speaking class in college. We might read the chapter on conflict resolution in his incredible book RESOLVED and puzzle that this great man describes his younger self as a “no-people skills engineer.” We might see the tens of thousands of people at a Major function and forget that he struggled for several years to build a business community past 200 people. And we might look at his lifestyle, his homes in Florida and Michigan, and his yacht, and not realize the massive battles that Orrin and Laurie have waged behind the scenes on our behalf.

Simply put, if it weren’t for Orrin and Laurie Woodward, there wouldn’t be any TEAM or the LIFE business, period. When we faced a battle against our former supplier, Orrin and Laurie bore the brunt of the attacks. I know that he has dipped into his own pocket for multiple seven-figures to cover legal expenses, possible only because he lives a debt-free lifestyle. I know that he has been the target of terrible lies and attacks on his character from nameless critics too cowardly to reveal their identity. I know that he and Laurie have put many of their personal dreams on hold, including denying themselves the building of their dream home in Florida for the last four years, in order that you and I may have a business to bring our own dreams to life.

Building this business, both TEAM and now LIFE, is not about the money for Orrin and Laurie. If it were, they would never have gone through all they’ve endured. They would have sat back and collected a check from our former supplier. But they would not. Orrin could have sailed off into the sunset as a motivational speaker and author, leaving us on our own. But he would not. Orrin and Laurie could have begun this great fight, buckled under the pressure and quit. But they would not. For Orrin and Laurie, building this business is about creating a community of a million people, of saving marriages, freeing people from financial bondage, and affecting our culture in a positive way.

I don’t personally know any other man who could have endured what Orrin has gone through and had the grit to stay the course. I’ve seen Orrin with tears in his eyes as we watched our friends suffer personally and financially. I’ve watched his heart break as people whom he had poured his love and energy into would fail to keep their commitments to him, only to see him think upon them with a forgiving heart, knowing that they are just fallen men, as he is. I’ve watched him suffer the sting of terrible lies, and because he holds his character so high he refuses to gossip about the liars. I know people who quite simply are telling lies about Orrin. If Orrin ever decides to go public with all that he knows (and can document) about these slanderous attacks, they will be embarrassingly exposed.

Like any man, Orrin has experienced moments where he has been down in the dumps. But he is an uncommon man, and because he has RESOLVED to have a high Adversity Quotient, he always gets back up and leads.

Orrin has been there for me countless times when I felt broken, praying with me in times of deep personal crisis. Laurie has done the same for Amy; as I was frantically criss-crossing the country during the height of our battle with our former supplier, Laurie was the bedrock friend and mentor that Amy needed in some of our darkest hours. Thank you, Laurie Woodward.

Most people have to go to the movies or read great books to be exposed to heroes. Amy and I are blessed to know some real-life heroes and count them among our best of friends for life. Orrin and Laurie Woodward, thank you for your leadership, your commitment, your pledge to serve and reach a million people. None of us would have anything if it weren’t for the sacrifice you’ve made for us.

Tim and Amy

Congratulations Orrin Woodward!!

IAB TOP 10 SMALL BUSINESS AWARDS

 

Independent Association of Businesses highlights the following category as the 2011 TOP LEADERSHIP AWARD WINNER!

The IAB Small Business Awards recognizes and awards businesses who achieve both qualitative and quantitave results in their organization.  The leadership award is the highest award given among all 10 categories.  This award applies to ones own leadership principals and how they help develop and influence successful leaders throughout American businesses.

The criteria for the IAB Awards winners includes,

– Originality of ideas
– Practicality of ideas
– Presentation style
– Testimonials
– Impact of ideas
– Quality of web content, publications and writings
– Ranking of website in America

The 2011 Top Leadership Website Award goes to: 

Orrin Woodward : http://www.orrinwoodward.com/

We want to thank all of our followers for your contributions, thoughts and ideas that have been submitted over this past year. 

For additional questions about the IAB Small Business Awards,
please email us at: iabusa@yahoo.com.

 

Help me choose a Caption..

In Life it takes guts to lead and grow to become better and  you end up separating  yourself from the crowd and many think you are crazy.  The ones who fight  long enough to change will eventually win. Orrin Woodward says “those who stay will be champions”   Write a caption for this courageous boy. I sometimes feel this way!       MerryChristmas